No Reading?!

Somehow I managed to get a scratch on my cornea, right in the middle. Wow, is that painful!  Luckily this heals quickly, so what started Sunday morning was much better by Tuesday night.  The bad part, besides the eye pain, swelling, and constant watering, was that I was restricted from reading until my eye was 90 percent healed.  Which meant I was not able to read until Wednesday.

That was horrible! It’s not just that I’m stuck in the recliner, but that reading relaxes me.  It helps me not stress out about life.  If I have to go too long without reading I get antsy, and cranky.  It is my addiction.  I was so relieved on Wednesday when I could open my Kindle and start reading my current book.  I’m happy to say both my eye and my mood are very improved!

I was stuck watching TV, and I am not against watching TV, because there are a lot of shows Husband and I follow. Which are at night.  Daytime TV is pretty bad.  I’m not even that picky, but I realized there are only so many shows about finding or improving houses I can watch at one time.  Same for weddings and wedding dresses.  I can say with authority now that my living room really needs to be painted.

I realized that even though I say I’ve come to terms with being mostly confined to the house, I really haven’t. A few days without being able to read showed me that.  I’m not cut out to sit at home all day.  I like to be around people, even if we are all in our own cubicles, we still interact throughout the day.  I like to accomplish things, and run around, and have more plans than I can possibly get to in one day.  Reading helps me not dwell on that, but really, I’m like a grounded teenager, grinding my teeth and muttering under my breath about how tough I have it.

But, right now I have a new book to start, so I don’t have time to dwell on this. For the next several hours at least.  An adventure is waiting to take me out of the recliner, so I’m mentally packed and ready to go!

Advertisements

Getting Back

It has been way too long since I posted anything. At first it was because life got a little crazy with my getting a promotion at work (yay!), the girls graduating (another yay!), and everything that went into all of that.  But then my life fell apart, and that is really why I haven’t posted.

I think letting the bad get in the way of my writing has not been good for me. I was really enjoying writing, and it made me happy.  I enjoyed reading the postings of everyone I followed, which also made me happy.  But in the long months since I’ve not posted, I also haven’t read the blogs I follow.  I intend for all of this to stop today.

At the beginning of summer my body gave up, the intense pain started, and I’ve pretty much been stuck in a recliner. I started out stuck in bed or on the air mattress Husband put up in the living room, so upgrading to the recliner was actually great.  With the help of a cane I can walk a little, and stand a little, and I can sit in a chair a little.  I can’t do any of these activities a lot, which is restrictive.  I haven’t been to work since this started, but I have watched almost the entire 9 seasons of The Walton’s!

I’ve had 7 procedures, and I was so very hopeful after the 7th, which happened 2 weeks ago. But, I don’t think it worked (although I’m supposed to give it a full month to take effect), because my pain spread a little, and I am having more problems walking than I was.  So now I have to get all of my records together and make appointments with surgeons.  I’ve said in the past that there was no way I would consider surgery unless I was to the point where I couldn’t walk and I was in constant pain…which is where I am, so now I have to hope I am a surgical candidate.

Pain is so wearing. I’ve lived with constant but manageable pain for 6 years, but what I am going through now beats all of that.  I’m on so many medications to help the pain I had to set alarms for when I’m supposed to take them, and then remember what I’m supposed to take when the alarm goes off.  I use 3 different over-the-counter creams when I go to bed to try and numb the pain so I can fall asleep.  I rotate them so I have a better chance of them not losing their effectiveness over time by my skin getting used to them.  Even with all of this I constantly hurt, and hurt fairly high on the pain scale…being at a 6 is a good day for me.

I am not doing too bad staying cheerful and optimistic, although Husband might say differently. I think blogging again, and reading other bloggers will definitely improve my days, especially since I’m almost out of Walton’s episodes to watch.  I really do have a lot of wonderful people in my life, and good things happening.  I can’t let the pain diminish that, and more importantly, I won’t.  So, I’m looking forward to reconnecting to blogging and bloggers, and upping the good over the not good in my life.  Happy Monday!