Yes, today will be a rant, and maybe even a whine. But this has been on my mind all week (remember, I am stuck in a recliner all day), and I decided all of you would just Love to let me get it all out, so I quite thinking about it, and can get on with life. Or at least reading all of your wonderful blogs that keep me going and sane right now. Okay, here we go…
Last week I was sick, and couldn’t make the football game. I loathe when that happens because I hate to miss seeing Little One cheer. But, with the way seating happened, all I would have seen were people’s rear ends, which while some would have been nice to gaze at, would have irritated me because they would have blocked the cheerleaders.
There is a group of us that sit together at the games. Husband and I usually arrive early, and then try to make sure there is room for the others. Now, we don’t see these parents outside of school events, but we all chat, and we see each other through football and basketball season, so we are together a lot. At the games we chat, we cheer for our kids, and we have a good time.
Husband went by himself to the game. Little One would have been really upset without a parent showing up, and he loves to watch the kids play football. After all this time we know most of the kids who play. He had his folding chair, and when he arrived, no one had saved him a place. And no one offered to move to make room for him. And he barely got a hello. Everyone had to move shortly after this to the parking lot behind a chain link fence, and again no one in the group made any effort to include him. He chatted with other people during the game, but he didn’t feel part of it all like he usually does.
When he got home and told me this it really peeved me. One of the Moms knew I was sick and couldn’t make the game. I would have saved a place for her husband, and made sure Husband knew he was flying solo and to chat with him. What we got was the opposite, which besides getting me mad, also made me question the friendships. Which has made it difficult this past week to interact with the Mom I text with a lot.
What do these parent friendships, where we sit together weekly at games for our kids, chat, and get to know each other really mean? I frequently bring their kids to my house after school when their parents are at work, and take them to the game or get them to the school to ride the van to the game. I’ve had a parent bring Little One home a couple of times when I’ve had a doctor’s appointment. I know we don’t have life long bonds going here, but I thought there was a definite group where we sat together, and looked forward to being together weekly. Perhaps I was wrong.
I’m not going to say anything to any of them tomorrow, because it would just cause unnecessary drama. And it wouldn’t make a difference; I can see the blank looks I’d get for asking why they didn’t make a place for him at the last game. And, it also feels wrong to me to bring it up. But I will be seeing everyone in a different way, and interacting with them differently. I can’t help it. They’ll put it down to my not feeling well, and being in pain. Because we see what we want to see. And right now, I see people who really aren’t friends.